INSTITUTIONAL-GRADE* HONESTY  (*institution not found)

THE LEAST STABLE STABLECOIN IN CRYPTO.

Every stablecoin promises a peg. We promise a direction: unclear. $USDP — all the corporate confidence, none of the stability. At least we're honest.

CURRENT PEG
$1.00
STABLE ✓

Peg is a mindset.

Get $USDP Follow the Peg Read the Stability Plan →
VERIFIED

Verified Reserves of Truth — One Address, Fully Backed

CONTRACT ADDRESS (THE ONLY ONE)
{{CONTRACT_ADDRESS}}
Copied. This value will not drift.
OFFICIAL X → @stablepons BUY ON PONS

Our peg drifts. Our contract address does not. Any other CA claiming to be $USDP is unbacked by anything, including a photograph of a dollar. We never DM first.

the only thing here that doesn't move.

TRUSTED BY — No Banks · No Auditors · One Very Tired Lawyer · NOT ACTUALLY A STABLECOIN

FULL TRANSPARENCY, PARTIAL STABILITY

Reserves

Independently unverified. Updated whenever someone remembers.

Backing Composition

100% backed*
  • Vibes — 40%
  • Hopium — 35%
  • A Photograph Of A Dollar — 24%
  • Actual Dollars — 1%

*Figures reviewed by Steve (see Attestations). Rounding may include optimism.

TOTAL SUPPLY

1,000,000,000

$USDP — each one equally unstable.

TAX

0 / 0

Fees would imply a business model.

LIQUIDITY

LOCKED

The vault wobbles but it holds.

REDEMPTION

1 : 1

1 $USDP redeemable for 1 $USDP at all times. Guaranteed.

peg_maintenance.py — compliance@stablepons

AUTOMATED PEG DEFENSE

The algorithm is working. On itself.

Our proprietary stabilization engine monitors $USDP around the clock. Upon detecting any deviation from the target, it responds instantly — by generating a new, more interesting deviation. The loop has never exited. Engineering calls this "uptime." Compliance calls it "a walk." The peg calls it nothing, because the peg is not real.

TRUST · TRANSPARENCY · TURBULENCE

The Stability Plan

A four-phase institutional framework. Each phase is more confident than the last.

  1. 1

    PHASE 1 — PEG

    We declare the peg. Declaring is the easy part.

  2. 2

    PHASE 2 — DEPEG

    A scheduled feature. Other stablecoins do this by accident. Amateurs.

  3. 3

    PHASE 3 — REPEG

    The triumphant return to a number we made up.

  4. 4

    PHASE 4 — TRANSCEND THE PEG

    Peg is a mindset. The chart is a mirror. Namaste.

INDEPENDENT* REVIEWS  (*dependent)

Attestations

Rigorously sourced from people we already knew.

Steve the auditor presenting the framed photograph of a dollar that backs the reserves
"I have reviewed the reserves. There is a photograph of a dollar. It's a very good photograph. Approved."
Steve, Auditor (cousin)
The former risk officer standing beside his warning report, now framed and hung in the lobby
"I flagged 47 risks in week one. They framed the report and hung it in the lobby. I respect it. I bought some."
Former Risk Officer
The very tired lawyer holding his coffee, quietly accepting the situation
"For the record: NOT a stablecoin. For my record: I hold a small amount. Do not tell the bar association."
The Very Tired Lawyer

ONBOARDING, LOOSELY

Get $USDP

Three steps. Zero guarantees. Full corporate courtesy throughout.

1

Open an account

A wallet. KYC: Know Your Chaos.

2

Deposit

An amount whose loss would be, in corporate terms, "within risk appetite."

3

Acquire stability*

Buy $USDP. (*see name of token for expectations management)

Get $USDP
{{CONTRACT_ADDRESS}}
Copied. This value will not drift.

FREQUENTLY AVOIDED QUESTIONS

FAQ

Is this a stablecoin?

No. NOT ACTUALLY A STABLECOIN. It is a memecoin wearing a very nice suit. The suit is also unstable.

What backs $USDP?

Vibes, hopium, and a genuinely excellent photograph of a dollar. Framed.

What is the peg?

A cherished corporate tradition we observe from a distance.

Wen stability?

Emotionally? Never. That's the product.

How do I know I have the real $USDP?

Check the contract address against the Verified Reserves of Truth card on this page — that is the only place we publish it. We never DM first, and we will never ask you to "validate" or "sync" a wallet.